Life Is Ocean: Myriad Of Emotions – Today’s Emotion is ‘Feeling Offended’
“To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else”. ~ David A. Bednar
“When you are offended at any man’s fault, turn to yourself and study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger”. ~ Epictetus
Take a pause and recall the moments when your boss made fun of your proposal. Remember that day when your friend wanted to tell you about your new dress and a general discussion over skin tone and kid’s behavior? Deep down, you know it was simply a chit-chat? Never mind, tell me the truth, don’t you felt bad when your in-laws or relatives comment on your parenting?
Though we had options take it? or avoid it? We choose to take it and felt offended? Isn’t it?
Why People Feel Offended?
Feeling offended purely depends on how much the person has been accustomed to taking things personally. Those who attach their identity to their ego will be easily offended. They see the offense as a personal insult and chose to hold heavy feelings forever. I have tried to categorize people’s personalities based on their assumptions about themselves.
⏩ The ones who are and think they are smart
⏩ The ones who are smart but think they are not
⏩ The ones who think they are smart which in fact they are not
These easily offended people belong to the third category. They find it hard to accept the reality that there is a world of difference between their own perception and what others think or what reality is. This difference of understandings makes one easily offended.
Beneath every perception and above every reality, there is one truth that shines beyond; when you are confident in your own skin, no one can blitz you with their words or actions.
Strong self-image people are confident in, who they are and find it merely a waste of time and energy to challenge offense.
How To Stop being Offended?
Let’s go step by step to change our action by looking at the criticism from a new dimension and save our sanity from being offended!
✅ Know that you have a choice: You must analyze the options take it? or not to take it? It is not necessarily what you assume is only the right way to see the picture, so pick the option sincerely.
✅ Be the person of few words yet weighted one: Every action doesn’t need a reaction. If you genuinely feel offended, take charge like a calm and composed boss. Be the person of few words that put the weightage in the whole conversation.
✅ Consider the source: Do you really know the person? How is he/she connected to you? Professionally or personally? As both situations required different mechanisms to handle the situation. Though sensibility and audibility are required in both cases.
✅ Figure Out The intention: Double-check the purpose of what’s been said if the deed is done under animosity or unwittingly.
✅ Ask Yourself: Does it really need your attention? Getting triggered is the only option I am left with? Where and why it hit hard? Be warmhearted with your own self. Acknowledge if the healing process is still required.
✅ Listen to Other Side: You will either learn something new that apprise you to take a step in the direction of their view; if not, it may intensify your faith on your own. An acquaintance of knowledge is guaranteed both ways.
✅ Drop Your Ego, Desire To Change And Control Other’s View: You are not here to preach or teach anyone. Everyone has the right to build their own beliefs and thoughts. If you wish to see the change, leave the ego behind and let the change begin with you.
In the end, what matters only, you need to understand that nobody can offend you unless you give them permission to do so. Since you don’t have control over other’s mouths and behavior, you must take charge, the way you react. Hence, don’t jump at their throats and be picky about what you find truly offensive.
Do let me know if you could connect at any point here!!
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Read Theme Reveal here.
Letter A: Appreciate the things you see or you feel.
Letter B: Latest trend of bullying.
Letter C: Confrontation is an art more than science
Letter D: “Deja Vu”
Letter E: Embrace your imperfections
Letter F: 8 things to sacrifice for better future
Letter G: How to proceed guilt-free Life?
Letter H: Value Your Time, Help, And Advice
Letter I: Find Your Ikigai
Letter J: How to jazz Up your life?
Letter K: Kinds Of People You Meet In Life
Letter L: Learn To Let Go Of The Past
Letter M: 7 Common Myths About Emotion
Letter N: How To Identify Non-Assertive Behavior?
‘This post is written as a part of #BlogchatterA2Z Challenge, organized by Blogchatter.‘
Copyright © Archana Srivastava
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I definitely needed to read this as it’s something that I need to work on . Thank you for sharing this
🤗🤗
This would be the common sign of you not agreeing with the other. But asking yourself is a good point to check if this is worth doing it
Thank you Sadvika 🙂
Earlier i use to get offended easily and it used to effect me a lot . Nowadays i just ignore and walk away . But i can’t help when others get offended by me .
That’s Amazing, means you have found your solace 🙂
Sadly this has become the most common reaction online, hasn’t it. I’ve tried my best but definitely lost my cool quite a few times, especially in the last few years
Yes, It happens sometimes!
All the pointers are so good Archana. and loved the end message. I agree we can not change other people’s reaction or actions but we can change our perspective and can decide how will we react on this? also, I strongly believe in point no.2 ..using few but weighted words could make a major difference in whole conversation.
Thank you so much Surbhi 🙂
having zero ego indeed helps us in feeling less offended buddy, I loved your recommendatios
Thank you Roma 🙂
Feeling offended is really easy and you have pointed out the reasons behind them very well. Also how not to feel offended is very important. Nobody can offend you if do not allow it. Wonderfully addressed
Deepika Sharma
Thank you so much Deepika 🙂
There are many situations when you feel offended but I share my thoughts in minimum words!! I loved the tips!!
Thank you 🙂
Taking offence is one of the most common reaction to anything nowadays. True, it’s just the perception that one is smart and can’t be wrong. People must keep an open mind and welcome other views.
Exactly, What I feel Varsha. 🙂
Sometimes people offend me unintentionally in that case I am absolutely fine but if someone is offending me intentionally and keep repeating their action than I make sure that I make them feel worse.
Yes,,, Dear! Sometimes we have to take calls and let them taste their own medicine. 🙂
It happens with all of us at some point. We feel offended and it affects our mental health. The steps shared by you mean a lot in those moments.
Thank you Aditi 🙂
The ones who take the things personally get offended easily.. true!! Yes, the best approach is to try to ignore it if it doesn’t really need your attention. Listening to the other side can also save us from unwanted embarrassment. More or less, it is the balancing act between what we see, perceive, absorb, and react to.
Absolutely agree with it.:)
This is a nice post. When we feel offended it makes us angry as well as sad. Taking a pause and thinking about the reason really helps.
Thank you Ujjwal!
Oh, I have been in this place a lot of many times. I do feel offended but I’m improving since the last few years too. To me, it happens coz of a lack of a strong sense of self and not that I feel I’m smart. Nice tips to stop being feeling offended.
Thank you Pragun!
I like reading your posts . However, I also feel that the font could be a little more reader friendly in terms of choice of font, size and brightness. Of course this is a my personal view.
Rajeev Moothedath
Sure Sir, Thank you so much for stopping by!
Too many offenses nowadays in every day life and social media this post makes one think here from atoz
https://poojapriyamvada.blogspot.com/2021/04/onism-newnormal-a2z.html
Thank you so much, Pooja!
Interesting topic…I feel it leads to a lot of negative emotions and hurts one more than necessary. I am a very calm and peaceful person and I forgive easily. I don’t get offended r hold grudges. It keeps me lighter this way.
Thank you Harjeet!
Agree with all points